Our House: A very real documentary about kids of gay and lesbian parents


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THE FAMILIES

Five families have opened their homes and speak frankly about the issues that face American families that don't fit the traditional model. The featured households come from a variety of socioeconomic, racial and ethnic backgrounds and live in different regions of the United States.

These young people have a lot to say about our culture and the evolving American family. By inviting us into their homes, they challenge us to explore our own understanding of what makes a family and how we can support all the children growing up in our communities.

Spend some time with each family. View video clips and/or read the corresponding text. Come in and meet the families of OUR HOUSE.

Photo: Donna DeCesare

In an affluent Long Island neighborhood, Daniel, 13, Jessica, 9 and their younger brother and sisters live with their adopted fathers Rob and Jon. Jessica insists that she prefers having two dads, and dreams of the day that her dads will get married. Daniel makes it clear that he supports his fathers, but he's more interested in soccer and basketball.

"It would be so much better if, like, everybody that asked me [about my fathers] would be in one big room and I'd tell them, and after that I wouldn't have to say it once more. I'd be free for the whole rest of my life..."

- Daniel, age 13

More from Long Island
Video | Transcript

Photo: Russell Cothren

In rural Arkansas, Ryan, 15 and Cary, 23 live with their mothers Vickie and Sophia, who were married five years ago. In their small, Bible belt town, there was a backlash against Ryan when she told classmates about her moms' commitment ceremony. After two years of teasing and physical abuse at school, Ryan's mothers decided to home school her.

"It's just another thing for kids to pick on each other about. You know they do it. Give them another reason, it's just gonna make it that much worse."

- Cary, age 23

More from Arkansas
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Photo: James Crnkovich

In suburban Arizona, Danna, 14, and Ember, 16, were raised in a devout Mormon household until their father, Dwight, came out and their parents divorced. Both girls struggle to reconcile the Mormon Church's condemnation of homosexuality and their love for their father, who is currently single, but dating. While Ember has left the church, Danna still attends with their mother, Jan.

"I talked to the bishop. I talked to my teachers and they all told me the same thing...your dad's gay. That's bad and I would be a better Mormon for forgiving him...but I didn't want to forgive him. I mean...what had he done wrong?"

- Ember, age 16

More from Arizona
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Photo: Donna DeCesare

In New Jersey, Saveon, 9, Sandor, 13, and Ivoire, 16, live with their mothers, Rochelle and Pat. The family attends a nearby gay gospel church, but outside of this environment, the children don't tell their friends about their two mothers. "I'm too busy playing, so I don't have time to tell them," says Saveon. To complicate matters, Saveon and Sandor both have to cope with their father's open disapproval of their mother's sexuality.

"If they make fun of it, I get real mad and I might beat 'em up."

- Saveon, age 9

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Photo: Donna DeCesare

In Greenwich Village, New York City, Ry, 17, and Cade, 19, live with their mothers, Sandy and Robin, who conceived the girls through donor insemination. Cade has just come out as a lesbian, and rebels against her mothers by being a "dyke" with a short haircut and freedom rings. The family also describes their recent victory in a four-year legal battle against Ry's donor who sued Ry's biological mother for declaration of paternity and visitation rights.

"I wouldn't say that having lesbian parents is an issue in my life, but I wonder, will it ever just be nothing? You know, where on a form it doesn't say 'mother/father' and it's kind of like I wait for that day."

- Ry, age 17

More from New York City
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