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<< Return to Honoring Patrick
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Memories of Patrick
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Carlos Avila
02/18/04@18:20
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<![CDATA[For me, Patrick will always be an intelligent
and passionate collaborator. Someone who
was loaded with integrity and was equally
honorable as production executive as he was
as a friend. He was a wonderful, kind man
with a wit as sharp as razor blades and a
heart that embraced even the most wayward
of us indie producers. It means a lot that so
many of us were lucky enough to work with
him and to call him a friend. He challenged
us, He made us better at what we did. He
shared his talent. He gave us his time.
Thank you, Patrick. And thank you, Kristi for
sharing him with us.
]]>
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Ellen Spiro
02/18/04@19:19
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<![CDATA[Patrick could make me laugh in the most trying of
circumstances, which, during the course of two ITVS
projects, were plentiful. When I talked to Patrick on the
phone, we often wound up on a fabulous digression
that left me amazed, like the story of how his dad had
invented Call Waiting but only got paid his usual wage
for it. He told me that story after we were interrupted
three times by my call waiting and I cursed the person
who invented it! When I saw Patrick in person, it was
always a struggle to concentrate on serious issues, as
they existed in such stark contrast to his crazy hat or his
skin tight pants or some other startling article of
clothing. Patrick moved through the world like a
brightly glowing exotic flying insect, flaunting his own
weirdness in a way that encouraged the rest of us. He
was way too young and too bright to leave this world
and his generosity of time, spirit and intelligence was
immeasurable.]]>
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julia reichert
02/18/04@20:22
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<![CDATA[It is very hard to believe that an energy as
strong as Patrick's, a heart as bold, a wit as
clear, a voice as distinct, could have entered
eternity. How could he be here no longer,
could be gone form us? How could this be?
Of anyone, he was most there for us, the
"wayward indies", as Calros so beautifully put
it. He put himself out there, he had opinions,
he was a fighter, a fighter for others. Hell, he
had principles. He was a model of how we
should treat each other.
I know he suffered, I am sure he was scared.
That gives us pain. I hope his passing over
was peaceful.
The moment I probably remember most was
during an extended discussion of PBS rules
about underwriting...one of those three cel
phone calls discussions. In this case, most
of them were held outdoors in freezing cold
NYC lower 6th avenue wind as I walked
between a borrowed apartment and a
borrowed editing room. He was back and
forth with lawyers and with me, the question
being whether a foundation whose expressed
purpose for being was to support cancer
survivors could sponser a film about people
fighting cancer. The lawyer types had their
doubts, because this foundation "took a
stand" on one side, against cancer. As my
phone hands shook with cold, he started to
explain that this might not be "balanced", then
we both started laughing at the idea that we'd
need to find a foundation that was FOR
cancer. His funny, angry explitives overroad
the noise of winter and the street, and gave
me confidence.
Patrick embodied the independent makers
perspective about television, and he was
among our most articulate, forceful
spokespersons. He helped us believe in
ourselves. He helped, in a very big way, keep
us going, keep our dreams alive.
He belongs to the ages now. We can honor
him by keeping on.]]>
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Pamela Roberts
proberts@mcn.net
02/18/04@20:46
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<![CDATA[When I look back on the past 20 years of
independent work in film, Patrick stands out
as the one - the one guy on the "inside" who I
liked best of all. He was incredibly smart,
insightful, delightfully weird and very, very
supportive of independent filmmakers. When
I needed his help, he was there. I feel
fortunate to have counted him as a friend. He
was simply the best and I will miss him. ]]>
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Amie Williams
02/18/04@21:35
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<![CDATA[My first visit to the ITVS offices in San Francisco were
memorable because of Patrick's large and colorful
gambling dice tie he was wearing (I used to live in
Vegas) and he was one of the few who understood that
town (beyond the obvious). I made an ITVS film about
childhood cancer, and his insight and sensitivity were
remarkable, if not ironic (at the time I had no idea he
was suffering from cancer). Later, he told me about this
fab Duluth-based band, LOW. I am listening to it now,
in memory of this one of a kind soul, this funny, this
never to be forgotten man. Anyone who knew him
would love this music as well...here's to you, Patrick,
and "things we lost in the fire..."]]>
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Andrew Garrison
agarrison@mail.utexas.edu
02/18/04@21:50
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<![CDATA[As a colleague I felt my work supported by Patrick
and yet also found him a terrific, honest
appraiser. But more important for me in my
relationship with Patrick, was the sheer, manic
pleasure of hanging out with him.]]>
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Tom Adams
tom_j_adams@yahoo.com
02/19/04@00:08
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<![CDATA[Kristi is my niece. Some years back, she, along
with her mom and dad, once picked me up at the
Minneapolis airport, and as we were driving, I
asked her: "Who is your main squeeze?" She was
silent, embarrassed, and I think a little angry
with me. Soon thereafter I met Patrick. And
while shy at the beginning, our friendship grew
apace. He was much more than a squeeze. Patrick
was full of the juice of life. He had
tenderness, compassion, wit, and great
intelligence which he carried lightly. When last
I saw him in the hospital, I held his hand.
After everyone left the room, I told him: "I love
you." He said: "I love you too."]]>
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Cindy Burstein, ITVS Community Connections Project
02/19/04@07:18
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<![CDATA[I didn't have a chance to get to know Patrick as
well as I would have liked, but he left quite an
impression on me the first time I met him. It was
during the ITVS 10th Anniversary Party at the PBS
Annual Meeting here in Philadelphia. After
meeting him, I was immediately attracted to his
dynamic spirit. Since that first encounter, I
very much looked forward to seeing him, and saying
hello during my annual visit to the ITVS office. ]]>
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Suzanne Stenson O'Brien
suzzo@suzzo.com
02/19/04@08:20
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<![CDATA[Okay... now I'll cry. I've missed a lot by not
being at his side, and Kristi's, separated by
half a continent in these last months. But the
memories are vivid and lasting, and a little
leather piece of my very sad heart belongs to
Patrick.
I don't think ITVS would exist in its current
form without his contributions. He was a
throughline from the days when, as the first
staffer, he "opened that first file folder and
wrote 'ITVS' on it." His drive informed the
early years of figuring out how to do the
impossible; his righteous spirit brought the
organization through the trials of Newt's
Congress; and he lives on through that certain
sense of tenacity and dream-making.
Patrick taught me a lot, including the idea that
we're all essentially frauds unless we admit our
inner humanity. Although his opinions quieted
when on issues of the heart, he was really in
love with life and I think he grew his own place
in it. His skepticism served him well, and me
too, when he would rant on a particular bone or
theoretical construct and reduce me, literally,
to the floor, in tears of laughter.
Patrick was the first person with whom I ever
surfed the web, now my home away from home. He
encouraged me to be happy and hip after my
divorce. He taught me lots of new words and bits
of information and a variety of historical points
that (although he deemed them "useless") have
stuck in strange ways to the sides of my life.
And oh...the movies....
It's a crying shame that he was cut short, so
young. ]]>
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Lynne Kirby
kirbyl@courttv.com
02/19/04@11:09
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<![CDATA[I always thought of Patrick as my little brother -
- the brother I always wish I'd had: brilliant,
speedy (a quality I treasure), creative,
offbeat,warm, funny, utterly unique. He and
Kristi were lucky to have each other. We were all
lucky to know him. I'll always love him. ]]>
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Carol Cornsilk
AdanvdoVision@aol.com
02/19/04@13:25
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<![CDATA[After the first time I met Patrick in June, 2000
at the PBS annual meeting,I spent the next few
months trying to think of just the word to
describe him. When we met the second time as he
exited the elevator at the Donatello Hotel, with
his perennial pork pie hat and black frame
glasses framing insightful eyes and wry,crooked
smile, my menopausally-challenged mental
thesaurus sprung to life and
blurted, "ZANY!". "You are really zany,
Patrick," I offered unapologetically. He looked
at me, eyebrows cocked askew, and said, "Gee, no
one's ever called me that before."
And whether dancing at the ITVS 10th Anniversary
Party, collaborating on how to bring an ITVS/NAPT
co-funded production to fruition, or singing
karaoke...ZANY is what he will always be to me.
What a blessing to have such a brilliant spirit
pass through my life. It reminds me to
appreciate even the most brief moments. Thank
you, Patrick.
]]>
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Lise Yasui
yasui@aol.com
02/19/04@13:48
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<![CDATA[Dear Patrick, Your energy and zaniness; your
love of life’s foibles, quirks, and odd turns and
your talent for turning the rest of the world
onto them will be sorely missed. Thank you for
your dedication to worthy causes and sometimes
errant but always earnest filmmakers. You made a
bright spark wherever you roamed - may your
spirit continue to lighten the hearts and
energize the souls of those you loved and cared
for. Godspeed.]]>
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Erick Highum
erickhighum@yahoo.com
02/19/04@13:57
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<![CDATA[Patrick was a great husband to my sister, a
great friend, and a care-for-the-world kind of
guy. On visits to San Fran he showed me the
highs and the lows of the city via his cherished
motorcycle. Through acts of kindness, his
honesty and wit, and laughter, he had a way of
seeking the good in life. His impact, to me, is
personal, as well as societal. Patrick made the
world a better place to live. And I miss him
greatly. ]]>
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Therese Buchmiller
buchmilt@mrs.umn.edu
02/19/04@15:33
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<![CDATA[EVERYTHING about Patrick was uniquely his own
crafting. What a flair for living he had, such inspiring
style, presence, and integrity--he gave us so much to
think about in his exceptional approach to things. I am
blessed to know Patrick, through my friendship with
Kristi Love, and I'll always treasure the way the two of
them made me feel right at home in SF. They helped
me settle in, provided me with abundant support,
laughter and entertainment in the years that I was there.
Patrick had this uncanny ability to draw you in to his
way of looking at things. I'll miss his remarkable
brilliance, biting wit, and inviting playfulness. Every
moment I shared with Kristi and Patrick provided clear
evidence of the exceptional love and respect they had
for one another. How perfectly suited they were, and
what an awesome life they shared. I trust with the
breadth of his influence, all of those remarkable
attributes of his will remain vivid in our memory of him,
and as well, influence the way we carry on. I'll
especially miss the bike rides, discourses on Buffy, the
splashy cosmopolitans he mixed up, and the
demonstrations of new additions to the toy collection. I
won't say goodbye Patrick. You will always remain in
my heart. Thank you for your wit and spirit. What a gift it
has been. ]]>
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Toni Tabora
02/19/04@16:33
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<![CDATA[My memories of Patrick are random: Patrick launching
our Minority Consortia PBS party to a rousing new
level with his expert karaoke rendition of a Pat
Benatar song; meeting up with Patrick and Kristi late
night at the Cheiftain to cheer on underdog Senegal
in their World Cup match against Sweden; ranting,
riffing on the joys and pains of dealing with
filmmakers, CPB, PBS over drinks at the Owl Tree; and
the last time I saw Patrick - he told us that all he
wanted to do was sit and hold Kristi's hand. Yes,
Patrick's thoughtful generosity, sharp wit, zany
fashion and deep knowledge about so much was truly
awesome. But the thing that will forever remind and
inspire me was the deep and unabashed love that he
shared with Kristi. Thank you Patrick.]]>
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Neil Sieling
nsieling@aol.com
02/20/04@09:36
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<![CDATA[The first time I met Patrick was also arguably his first
professional moment in the media world. He had just
finished his time as a student at Carleton College,
where he was predictably at the center of a culture of
film nuts. A natural next step was approaching Alive TV
for our one-year internship. Patrick showed up in a five-
dollar suit, purchased just before the interview at
Ragstock. He was full of bright, eager to please energy,
even though he was caught a little short by the Alive TV
staff being so casually dressed. Of course we
immediately tuned into Patrick’s many gifts and took
him on. Then we were pleased to facilitate his moving
over the skyway to start his career at ITVS, where he
became the longest-serving ITVS staffer and, in many
ways, the key institutional memory for the organization.
I have many memories of Patrick’s media career, but
his sui generis personality always stays with me. An
example is a memory of his clanging away on a guitar
at private concert at his and Kristi’s place. One song,
PDA No Way, was an attack on what Patrick thought
were tacky and irredeemable public displays of
affection. It was a polemic, but also sweet in a very
Patrick way. So I’ll gently contradict Patrick’s sentiment
and offer this public display of affection for Patrick,
whose memory will linger for a long time with all of us in
his extended family.
]]>
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Pamela Balabuszko-Reay
duchess@mn.rr.com
02/20/04@09:38
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<![CDATA[It was with shock and sadness that I read of Patrick's death in
the Minneapolis Star Tribune this morning. I lived across the
hall from Patrick on Harriet Avenue in Minneapolis. My husband
Jim did work with Patrick on films- composing the music.
Patrick video taped our wedding. I can still see Patrick and Kristi
doing the chicken dance- Kristi's gloved arms in the air. I would
hear about how they were doing in San Francisco sometimes
through other people. We had not heard that Patrick was sick.
Kristi- we remember Patrick as someone with a
wonderful creative mind and a fun sense of humor. We will be
thinking of you in the days ahead.
Pamela Balabuszko-Reay
4246 Scott Terrace
Edina Mn 55416]]>
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Mindy Aronoff
mindy@bavc.org
02/20/04@11:57
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<![CDATA[What a goofball! I loved baiting Patrick so that
he would start a litany of ridiculously funny
reasoning. A lovely, lovely man who will remain
in my thoughts always.]]>
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Julia Pimsleur
juliapim@mindspring.com
02/20/04@11:58
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<![CDATA[Patrick was a stellar storyteller, had an
infectious laugh, was a true cynic, and made you
wish he'd invite you for a ride on his
motorcycle. At ITVS board meetings he and Lois
would arrive fresh off his motorcyle with some
crazy story about what happened to them en
route, making us all feel we'd been there too
instead of stuck in a stuffy conference room.
Patrick could and did transport you into his
world, and for that we were all very grateful.
It seemed he was from a wacky wonderful place
where people wore signature dark rim glasses and
things that made them happy, and where there was
room for everyone.
I will miss Patrick for his wit, energy,
professionalism and exemplary ability to be
himself. My thoughts are with the ITVS staff and
of course his wife Kirsti. Ellen Spiro, thank
you for these words which speak better than I
can: "Patrick moved through the world like a
brightly glowing exotic flying insect, flaunting
his own weirdness in a way that encouraged the
rest of us."]]>
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Tina DiFeliciantonio & Jane C. Wagner
Tina@NakedEyeProductions.com
02/20/04@12:30
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<![CDATA[We write this with a very heavy heart. Patrick's illness
and passing feels incomprehensible. We can only
hope that he died without pain, knowing that he was
loved by innumerable colleagues and friends across
the country.
We worked with Patrick during his early years at ITVS
(while we were making GIRLS LIKE US) and kept in
touch with him since then. We will always be grateful
for his faith in us as filmmakers and for his never-
ending support. When others doubted, Patrick could
look beyond immediate difficulties and help others see
the potential that he saw.
It was a pleasure watching Patrick thrive and grow both
professionally and personally. We felt proud whenever
he was promoted because we knew how much he
deserved to be recognized for his work.
Patrick was kind and empathetic, intelligent and candid.
And while he didn’t pull punches, if he had to place a
hit, it was with humor and sensitivity.
Thank you Kristi for sharing Patrick with us. We will be
thinking of you in the days ahead and hope that you will
find solace in the love we all felt for him.
We will miss him.
]]>
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Jodi Epstein
hondurashodi@yahoo.com
02/20/04@13:39
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<![CDATA[I happened to be looking at the ITVS website when
I read about Patricks death. I sit in Honduras in
an internet cafe, feeling so far away from my old
colleages and wishing I could be there to grieve
the loss of Patrick W in person. Who else got so
excited about eating frozen lunches from Safeway,
getting dolled up for Halloween with me, playing
the Newlywed Game in staff retreats? He
enlightened me on subjects I never knew even
existed. I loved him for that... I know the world
will be a very different place without
Patrick ... please send my love to Christie and
everyone at ITVS.]]>
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Kyung Yu
02/20/04@15:02
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<![CDATA[My most memorable moment with Patrick was
the first time I met him during an ITVS
orientation weekend. I was nervous and
intimidated until Patrick introduced himself,
wearing a remarkable leopard print, button
down blazer. He proudly proclaimed that he
and Kristi made matching outfits for their
wedding and described their shared passion
for collecting unusual artifacts together. Since
then, I have come to know Patrick as an
exceedingly brilliant man with a tremendous
wit and sense of humor and a truly deep
commitment to bolstering the independent
filmmaking community. But sometimes, it's
really those small and brief moments that say
so much about a person. And when I think of
Patrick, I always picture him in that leopard
print jacket, his intellectual vitality and the
beaming love with which he spoke about his
new wife. He moved through the world with
heart and purpose and his very own sense of
being. I'll miss him.]]>
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Dan Satorius
02/20/04@17:00
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<![CDATA[
Patrick was a pal.
He was dependable in ways that made him a good
friend. You could depend on him to hold an
interesting and well-reasoned conversation on a
wide variety subjects. You could depend on him
to remember things that are important. When you
called on the phone and you said "hello, how are
you?" you better mean it because you could
depend on him to tell you the truth about how he
was. And it was not going to be chatty. You
could depend on his humor: wry, tending to
sardonic. You could depend on him to order a
cocktails of an unusual color.
Ideas excited Patrick. All ideas actually. He
was very democratic and eccletic in that way. He
could discuss with equal enthusiasm the most
obscure part of the US Copyrights Act having to
do with compulsory licensing of music in public
broadcasting and the virtues of BUFFY THE
VAMPIRE KILLER as cutting edge social
criticism. Both in the same conversation.
He had this funny way of being formal and funky
at the same time. I told him he should go to
law school but in retrospect that would have
been a waste. He was doing the right thing
already and he loved it. He was devoted to it
mind and soul in a way that demanded
admiration. Law school would have been a step
down for him.
I admired Patrick. I admired his mind. I
coveted his wardrobe.
I shall miss him dearly.
]]>
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Annie Moriyasu
amoriyasu@piccom.org
02/21/04@13:12
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<![CDATA[Today is his service and I am thinking of that crazy guy
we all loved and admired. I will never forget his
rendition of "Hit with Your Best Shot" with Lois at the
PBS mtg. Completely over the top and unabashed, he
sang with absolute juice.
I loved his ferocious wit, he spared no one or anything,
that is uncommon and to be envied.
I still have the karaoke video. What a guy.]]>
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Jordan Janeczko
jordan.janeczko@chello.at
02/21/04@15:22
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<![CDATA[Patrick and I met in Junior High, back when Ronald Reagan
was President and when Patrick already did a perfect John F
Kennedy voice (too many hours of listening to The First
Family album). I associate Patrick more with music than
with film and video: he was the one who had Big Science,
Trio and Error, and Bela Lugosi's Dead when most people
were listening to Like A Virgin. As far as I know, he was
able to play just about anything on the guitar (though was
known to get upset when not up to perfection on the solo
of Sultans of Swing, a song I think he respected, but did not
like). His bands throughout time, Eyes on Troy, Yin-Yang
Bomb, and the Christmas CD he did with Kristi, all show
different aspects of Pat. Who he was, what he appreciated,
or at least what he thought about. Today I scrunged up a
letter from Patrick which he wrote shortly after I moved to
Austria and he was still in the Twin Cities talking excitedly
about how the band he was in then, Rain Dog, had a great
show at the 24 Bar and was asked back - this time for
money. Exuberance left right and center.
Since the funeral service started a few hours ago, and a few
continents away, I've been reminisching (i.e. reminiscing
with a bottle of alcohol) and I thought I'd share a section
from the letter where he wrote about movies. It seems
appropriate for this page (thanks ITVS), and I think it shows
not only his wry sense of humor, but also shows how he
liked to really think about what he did, and thought a lot
about what he really liked to do.
-----
Eric, Peter, Kristi and I had the Gala opening (finally) of our
first film, Cycle Slut Christmas. The party was a raging
success. People actually laughed at the movie and kept
festing away afterward. The last people finally left my
apartment at 5:00 am or so. It sure was gratifying to hear
people laugh. I am convinced that the true difficulty of
comedy is that work tends to make things seem unfunny.
Sure, the idea is funny at first, but then during all the work
of putting the joke on film, it's easy to doubt and say, "is
this idea funny enough? Enough to justify the work? Funny
equal to say... lugging a 600 pound motorcycle off a truck"
and then when looking at the footage and spending all the
time editing and working with the soundtrack and in short,
seeing the footage 1 million times, nothing seems all that
funny anymore.
The next film we are working on isn't a comedy, but rather
an experimental documentary. so we don't have to sweat
the laughs. Instead we'll fret about whether we are boring
everybody to tears. It's going to be this sort of highbrow
meditation on the history of the St. Anthony Falls region of
Minneapolis as interpreted through the critical apparatus
laid out in Martin Heidegger's essay "The Question
Concerning Technology.," Look for it in a video store near
you. In the 15 minute opaque american experimental
documentary section of the video store.
-----
]]>
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Francesca Prada
dianafilms@aol.com
02/21/04@15:56
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<![CDATA[Patrick's singular vision, coupled with his
inherent compassion and red-hot wit, embody the
rarest combination of gifts a soul can bring
forth. I wish he could have stayed here longer,
there's no telling what wild children his
kaleidoscopic brain would have sprung.
Patrick, you are dearly missed and well remembered
by so many people. Who ever thought faux leopard
skin could make a person cry?
In friendship and with great care,
Francesca
]]>
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Amy Durgan
amydurgan@hotmaill.com
02/21/04@22:08
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<![CDATA[Is it me, or did Patrick seem to know something
about EVERYTHING? What I remember most about
Patrick, besides his intelligence, sense of
humor, occasional surliness and love of film and
music, is his complete adoration of his wife,
Kristy, who he liked to call his girlfriend,
perhaps because "wife" was too dowdy for someone
who loved bat-shaped peppermint patties. When I
asked him how he enjoyed the Academy Awards,
which he attended last year, Patrick said he
enjoyed the show, but he'd wished Kristy had been
there. Last fall, when we were talking on the
phone after he had been diagnosed, Patrick
said, "I'm worried about Kristy." Not knowing
what to say, I said, "Why?" He said, "Because I
love her." That was Patrick--heartbreakingly
honest. He never stopped surprising me. ]]>
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Ericka Olsen Stefano
erickaolsenstefano@yahoo.com
02/22/04@03:59
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<![CDATA[I wrote a long letter that got erased. and so I'll
stick with a list of Patrick memories from high
school and later.
1) the Grand Re-opening of the Glen, our local
$1.50 suburban re-run theater. After completing
repairs to keep the building from being condemned,
we attended the Gala opening in formal attire (we
were the only ones who saw this as an event), I
think seeing Molly Ringwald in Pretty in Pink.
Patrick : tuxedo, skinny tie with a keyboard down
the side, top hat, cane, and if I'm not mistaken, a
leopard print cumberbun. Quadrephenia meets Fred
Astaire.
2) his quoting the entirety of Monty Python and the
Holy Grail walking between the "social" (a weekly
dance "for the kids" which we all went to and all
hated) and Good-Buy ranch, where we went to get
totally wired on various sugar snacks. Returning,
now on a sugar high, quoting the entirely of Life
of Brian, this time at high speed.
3) an email, about his going to celebrate Holloween
on Castro Street despite San Francisco trying to
move the whole thing elsewhere. Patrick writes of
being dressed up in a shark suit enjoying the
evening with a few thousand other people, wandering
around in the dark.
Need I say more.
I don't know how to end this. Okay, like I began
it, a list : 1) unfair 2) beyond unfair 3) Kristi
I'll miss him.
]]>
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Emily Stevens
emilyemilyemily@earthlink.net
02/22/04@17:48
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<![CDATA[This website was empty when I first visited it and
I didn’t know where to start. But now all these
wonderful posts make me smile during this very sad
time, so thank you all for writing them, and thank
you, Patrick, for inspiring them. It was an honor
to be among those who spoke about this
extraordinary man at his memorial service
yesterday. Here’s pretty much what I said.
Patrick Wickham is the smartest person I’ve ever
met. If that sounds like hyperbole for the sake
of if today, it’s not. I’ve been saying that for
years. I met him in 1991 when we worked together
at ALIVE FROM OFF CENTER where he was the
production intern and possibly the world’s biggest
film geek. (In this crowd, that’s a compliment.
And it’s meant to be.) He then went to ITVS where
he served loyally from the day the doors opened.
A couple of years later I also got a job at ITVS,
as Patrick’s supposed "boss," but for the next
five years he taught me everything I know.
He was ever so good at dealing with budgets and
schedules and releases and contracts. I know that
sounds boring to some of you, but he loved that
stuff and, well, someone has too. (Besides me.)
He knew copyright law as well as any attorney, and
as Nondas said to me yesterday, "who else could
make insurance funny?"
He had this amazing work ethic, unmatched, and he
quietly took on and accomplished so much. If god
is in the details, then Patrick’s brain was god;
his memory was superhuman, he retained every
moment surrounding every project, every meeting,
every negotiation, every success or failure, and
in the re-telling of such dramas, he exhibited his
stunning gift for comedy, his biting wit. For
years he’s been the institutional memory, the soul
and the comic relief at ITVS, and I can’t imagine
life there without him.
Patrick was incredibly kind and generous. He
rarely said no to anyone, even when he should
have. He loved to help people solve problems and
he made their problems his own. Once in a while
when something really was just too much, he’d say
"well they’re asking for the moon, but the moon is
not available today." But I think he reached for
the moon for someone every day.
He was more than a brilliant negotiator and, as we
used to say, a bureaucrat with a heart of gold.
He was also a talented filmmaker himself, so he
truly empathized with the filmmakers he worked
with. He understood the passion of vision and the
incessant obstacles on every production. He used
to say "a successful film is one that gets
finished," and as flip as that may sound, he
wasn’t kidding. His own films were like him --
sharp, funny, edgy, brave, and endlessly
entertaining. If you’ve ever seen his (naked)
homage to Citizen Kane you know what I’m talking
about.
Outside of work Patrick really knew how to have a
good time. He cherished his motorcycle, he played
guitar beautifully, he and Kristi recorded music
together. His boundless enthusiasm for karaoke
persuaded many many people to sing in public,
including some who probably shouldn’t, like me. A
couple of years ago on New Year’s Eve, Patrick,
Kristi, Lois and Jannette drove down to Los
Angeles to surprise us – we were having a party --
and it really made our party special. My friends
in LA still talk about the guy in the leopard suit
doing karaoke.
The last time I got to spend time with Patrick
outside the hospital was in December in Las Vegas.
We met him and Kristi there for a few days at
Patrick’s favorite, the Hard Rock Hotel. And let
me just say a word here about Kristi. Although
Patrick’s time was shorter than any of us would
have chosen, he was actually a very lucky guy,
because he and Kristi found each other and in
Kristi he found the perfect partner. I can think
of no better word to describe their union.
Perfect.
Anyway, Vegas. The trip was fun but it sometimes
hard for Patrick. He never complained but he was
in pain, he had some trouble with meals, and last
but certainly not least, he got stuck at a losing
roulette table with a bunch of frat guys.
But he wore his leopard suit to the Brian Setzer
Orchestra concert, and walking around the casino
before the show, he looked like such a rock star
that people kept asking him if he were in the band.
We also had a really nice afternoon at the Hard
Rock Spa. At the gym he demonstrated his mastery
of the rock wall, climbing like a pro. Kristi and
I couldn’t quite keep up. And afterward in the
whirlpool and steam room, he was so comfortable
and relaxed, he said that for a while he actually
forgot he was sick.
That’s what I want to do, I want to forget he was
sick, and just remember him. I’m really going to
miss him. I know you all will too.
]]>
|
Janet Gardner
dragongar@aol.com
02/22/04@21:52
|
<![CDATA[When Pham Thai and I arrived in San Francisco in
January, 2001, Patrick was the first person to
greet us by name and make us feel right at home.
He was fun and sassy and smart.We were coming
from New York and didn't know what to expect as
new producers learning to work with ITVS. When
he grinned at us, we felt like we had won the
jackpot.
He was assigned to us as our production manager
for "Precious Cargo" and we expected him to cut
our budget. To our surprise he increased many
items. We knew then that we had an ally. After
that weekend, although we were in different
cities, we felt he was out pointman on the front
lines. He understood our struggle and had a great
sense of humor about it.
When we attended the ITVS 10th anniversary party
at the PBS meeting in Philadelphia, I spotted his
jaunty pork pie hat across the room and just had
to hug him.
Indie filmmakers have lost a true friend. His
wonderful wit, warmth, and dedication will live
on through the many friends he made and films he
helped us make better. We miss him and send our
love and sympathy to Kristi and all our ITVS
friends. ]]>
|
Dan Satorius
dsatorius@abdoabdo.com
02/23/04@16:52
|
<![CDATA[Patrick was a pal.
He was dependable in ways that made him a good friend. You
could depend on him to hold an interesting and well-reasoned
conversation on a wide variety subjects. You could depend on
him to remember things that are important. When you called on
the phone and you said "hello, how are you?" you better mean it
because you could depend on him to tell you the truth about
how he was. And it was not going to be chatty. You could
depend on his humor: wry, tending to sardonic. You could
depend on him to order a cocktails of an unusual color.
Ideas excited Patrick. All ideas actually. He was very democratic
and eclectic in that way. He could discuss with equal enthusiasm
the most obscure part of the US Copyrights Act having to do
with compulsory licensing of music in public broadcasting and
the virtues of BUFFY THE VAMPIRE KILLER as cutting edge social
criticism. Both in the same conversation.
He had this funny way of being formal and funky at the same
time. I told him he should go to law school but in retrospect
that would have been a waste. He was doing the right thing
already and he loved it. He was devoted to it mind and soul in a
way that demanded admiration. Law school would have been a
step down for him.
I admired Patrick. I admired his mind. I coveted his wardrobe.
I shall miss him dearly.]]>
|
Dee Davis
dee@ruralstrategies.org
02/23/04@16:54
|
<![CDATA[If I have a perspective to add to what you folks who worked so
closely with Patrick know, it comes from the time-lapse
photography of coming to town every few months for a couple
of days. I don't know if I got Patrick at first. I just saw him as a
funny kid. But I was impressed to see the other ITVS staff go to
this junior member of the club with most everything. He was
quotable. He had a caustic wit that separated pretense from
endeavor. And those that worked with him trusted his radar.
What I assumed at first was discomfort with himself or
unhappiness at being stuck in Minnesota, I later came to see as
discomfort with a world full of injustice and deceit. A better way
to say it is that Patrick had little time for phonies. What he did
have was a sense of fair play and an undisguisable Midwestern
earnestness. He believed in things: friendship, art, fighting a
good fight, telling people what you think. I saw that in St. Paul. I
saw that in San Francisco. He showed up. He put in the effort. In
an ethereal enterprise he gave good weight. Each day he strove
to make the world mean something. My heart goes out to Kristi,
his family, and to all you guys on the job.]]>
|
Mary Ann Thyken
maryann_thyken@itvs.org
02/23/04@16:57
|
<![CDATA[I invaded Patrick’s world just 16 short months ago. He quickly
learned that I watched Monster Garage and admired any film
featuring Kriswell. I discovered that he was admired hard luck
poker players and looked damn fine in drag…the beginning of a
beautiful friendship.
I liked dropping into his comfy cubby of an office to discuss the
rational of insurance limits and the arcane history of the CPB
along side the Simpsons and stuffed vampire mice. It was all
pretty entertaining with Patrick.
Then a strange thing happened. I took over his job as he moved
into the digital future. It was a move we both made with
considerable fear and trepidation. I didn’t want to follow the
smartest boy in the class, and he was wondering about his place
in the great blue yonder, but we took cautions steps down our
new paths.
That’s when he finally showed his true colors, which turned out
to be transparent. He never held things back, always
encouraged, and treated me with more kindness than
experience or Shakespeare would tell us a person could in that
situation. He wanted nothing but success for me, even in
moments that he needed a bulldozer to push back his own
sense of worthlessness (the boy could be a bit insecure you
know).
On a day like today I like thinking about being on the back of
Patrick’s motorcycle. As I alternately felt thrills and dread, his
confidence was overwhelming. His control was perfect. No
doubts about his own skill, no way.
On a day like today I also have to come to grips with the
profound loss of all I could have learned, all I could have
laughed and all I could have cared had I been able to live in
Patrick’s world a bit longer. My heart is broken and for me there
is no consolation.]]>
|
Aaron Latto
Aaron.Latto@stpaul.com
02/23/04@17:36
|
<![CDATA[Patrick was my friend in college, but I had not
seen him in a very long time and did not know he
was ill. All these wonderful stories about him!
Of course this is the man he became. I recall
that he'd so quickly identify the quirks of taste
in all those he met, so he frequently would
discuss the works of Brian Eno with me. He came
up to me out of the blue once and went off (in
great detail, of course) about how "I'll Come
Running to Tie Your Shoe" just did not fit in the
middle of the "Another Green World" CD. That
veered off into a discussion about how the CD
destroyed one of the great aspects of the vinyl
LP -- two distinct mood pieces, rather than one.
Thanks for giving a bit of yourself to so many.
May you find peace, my friend.]]>
|
Susan Mitchell
susanm@cranium.com
02/24/04@12:48
|
<![CDATA[I went to Carleton with Pat. I just heard his
voice recently, randomly, when I pulled out a
dusty old unmarked cassette tape and popped it
in to a player...it was one of my radio shows,
probably from 1990. Pat popped into the studio
to visit at some point during the show...as
usual, he was twice as smart, three times as
quick-witted, and four times as funny as anyone
else in the room. I could immediately picture
him saying something incredibly funny, pushing
his glasses back up his nose while peering out
over the top of them. He still made me laugh out
loud, a hundred years later, and it made me miss
him.]]>
|
Devorah DeVries
ddevries@nyc.rr.com
02/24/04@22:07
|
<![CDATA[I first met Patrick when I was answering the phones at
ITVS in 1993. We crossed paths a lot over the following
years. And I was always thrilled to see him. My favorite
Patrick memory is from backstage at one of his rock
shows in 1994. (He was part of a band he said he was
forced to leave because they didn't share his
suprisingly mainstream 'pop sensibilities') Backstage
Patrick and my old roommate Arzu managed to pull
together a game of "light as a feather, stiff as a board."
(A popular game in the 1970's - which was six kids
putting their index fingers underneath a child who was
laying down and then chanting with gusto 'light and
feather, stiff as a board" until it was time to lift the child
high above the ground with just their index fingers.)
Patrick had decided that if it worked with a bunch of 10
year olds -- it could work with a bunch of 20 somethings
backstage at a rock show. Patrick was brave and
volunteered to be the one that would lie still and
prepare to be lifted while we all put our energy into
chanting. We chanted 'light as feather, stiff as a board'
with straight faces and mid-range volume. Patrick
concentrated and believed. And then we made the
move -- and that night Patrick (dressed in some sort of
leopard outfit) was lifted a solid 2 feet above the ground
with our index fingers! ---Much later on --Patrick and I
would both tell this story to strangers at a few film
festival cocktail hours when we would run into
eachother-- and we never could get enough affirmation
about the shear magic of the event. But it is true.
He was absurdly smart, unbelivably funny, always kind
and -- I swear to God - the boy could levitate.
I will miss Patrick very much. ]]>
|
Shannon Manning
shannon AT littlecommie DOT com
02/25/04@01:19
|
<![CDATA[I haven't seen Patrick since high school, but had just been
thinking about him last week as I was showing my
boyfriend the high school literary magazine we edited (the
masthead lists Pat as "personal assistant to Jordan
Janeczko")
The preface and the midmagazine comic relief (a parody of
high school literary magazines) have Pat's voice all over
them. It struck me that he was one of the funniest,
smartest guys I have ever known. The following day I found
out about his passing.
It inspires me to see how much people continued to cherish
and love him, and how much good he continued to do for
the world and for people close to him. The buy a goat
program is beautiful, funny and beautiful, and fitting that
he should give us such a wonderful way to remember him.
My love to his family and friends.
Shannon Manning]]>
|
Melissa Nelson
missynelson@mail.utexas.edu
02/25/04@09:59
|
<![CDATA[I also knew Pat in college, and was fortunate
enough to enjoy his and Kristi's company in
Minneapolis for several years afterwards. He had
a theory about everything, and he was often
right, and always funny. I found myself passing
on his insights (always with proper credit,
Patrick, I promise) to new friends, sometimes
years later. He stuck with you that way.
Patrick blew into town (I now live in Austin,
Texas) a few years ago for the film component of
South By Southwest. I met him at a bar for
drinks. He whooshed in, full of enthusiasm for
the film he had just seen, full of entertaining
stories about old friends, full of his trademark
ebullient humor, full of love for Kristi and his
life and work in San Francisco. We ordered
cocktails and promptly picked up exactly where
we'd left off years before in Minneapolis. His
unique laugh rang out over the crowd. I left the
bar thinking how fantastic he was, and how he was
just the same as ever. No one could be easier to
remember with affection, laughter and joy. ]]>
|
Gita Saedi
gita@kartemquin.com
02/27/04@13:59
|
<![CDATA[Patrick was more than just our central contact at
ITVS for THE NEW AMERICANS. Throughout the last
couple years while answering myriad queries, he
shared his insight, his ideas, his wit through
his quirky fusion of work and fun. He truly
became a partner in every sense, and it was such
a joy to work with him. It's not fair that he's
not here to celebrate the project's completion.
But at least his legacy will live on, through
this and many other projects, through his wife
and through all of us that were lucky enough to
know him. His passing is such a very heavy thing
for so many of us that were touched by Patrick,
and the deepest of losses for the independent
community.]]>
|
Jessica Yu
DioramaInc@aol.com
02/27/04@14:02
|
<![CDATA[I was lucky to have worked with Patrick on two projects, a film
on civil war reenactors back in 1994, and then "In the Realms"
during the past two years. Both were oddball projects that I
thought only a mother could love, but Patrick embraced them
like a favorite uncle.
I know that Patrick fought for the films he believed in, and that
was certainly the case with my second ITVS project. He never
once said, "Hey, you know, I really stuck my neck out for you,"
but I knew from others that he had really put himself on the line.
He believed in filmmakers and the unconventional inspiration,
and I'm so grateful to have benefitted from his passion and
insight. His support was a motivation in itself; if Patrick believed
in me I felt strengthened in my efforts.
Of course, Patrick was also hilarious and smart and entirely
original. We saw him shortly before he was diagnosed; he met
several of our "Realms" crew for dinner in LA. He didn't eat
much, saying his appetite was down, but was happy to show us
his memorial kitty tattoo, which was just about the best thing
ever. Will I ever meet another man who could pull off such a
thing?
I'll miss you and remember you Patrick.]]>
|
Jennifer E. Bell
jenniferbell@wildmail.com, jbell@harpercollege.edu
02/27/04@17:31
|
<![CDATA[I was in many classes with Pat at Glenbard West
High School. Pat was not only smart and witty,
but thoughtful and insightful. Although I have
not seen him since high school, I will miss him
dearly. Pat's passing has made me think more
about the importance of life. . .living life to
the fullest, and giving to others. Thank you,
Patrick.]]>
|
Michael Shiro
Michael_Shiro@itvs.org
02/27/04@18:55
|
<![CDATA[Sometimes our darkest hours have a way of making
ourselves question our being. Why are we here?
Is this what I am supposed to be doing? Is this
who I am? Is this who I wanted to be? I queried
myself last night in this manner and I wrote many
pages of things. The first page or two
were “needs.” A list of things I “need” to
do...and a list of things I “need” to stop
doing. The second page was a list of my faults
and weaknesses. The last page was a list of
things I would recommit myself to. Things that I
had promised myself when I was an idealistic
person out of college. Things that I recommitted
myself to as each decade of my life passes by. I
promised to recommit myself to my life long goals
relating to art, to developing myself
intellectually, to developing more friends and
loving and honest relationships. To obtaining
wisdom and compassion. To developing a sharp
sense of humor and the ability to tell a story,
To even study politics... I thought that if I
could make it to old age accomplished in these
areas, I would consider my life a “SUCCESS”.
After I thought a while, I realized; even if I
achieved only one of those things, from the
vantage point of where I stand on 41 years of
living, I would have to be grateful for that. I
thought about this and I thought; well, maybe
that’s the best plan I can come up with for
myself (a .111 lifetime batting average).
And then, I thought of Patrick... And of course,
he excelled at all of those things! He had,
during the six years that I had the pleasure of
working with him, possessed all the things that I
had just rededicated the rest of my middle-aged
life to attempting to achieve (with the odds
stacked gravely against me achieving even one).
I thought a little more about this and I realized
two things: 1.) Patrick was probably born this
way – having already accomplished what I would
spend a lifetime trying to achieve – that’s how
far ahead of the game he seemed to me. And 2.)
Patrick was accomplished at far more things than
my paltry list of life’s goals... His sense of
fashion and style. His uncompromising
genuineness. His incredible memory and
processing speed. His originality and
magnetism. His way of drawing the best out of
the people he met. It only makes sense that he
would have been a great lover as well. And from
what has been written here about Kristi and
Patrick, and the times that I was lucky enough to
be in their company, Patrick was that as well.
Rest easy Patrick. God speed. There’s a new
angel in town and he’s tattooed with a one eyed
cat, rides a beautiful black bike and has some
ideas for improving things around here.
]]>
|
Tim Sites
jetson68@hotmail.com
02/28/04@00:10
|
<![CDATA[I met Patick in Jr High, but it wasn't until the
latter half of high school that our group really
came together. In a group of very smart people
(they kept me around to lift heavy objects),
Patrick stood out. After reading all of the
above, it seems like that never stopped. He was
smart and funny, and always had a perspective
that was a little different. Pat was cool in
ways that made me feel a little more hip just
for hanging with him.
18 months ago, Pat was the driving force behind
a mini high school reunion in Las Vegas.
Without him, we never would have gotten it
together. In hindsight I'm so happy we were
able to do that. Pat was hilarious, insightful,
and shined in clothes that I could never come
close to pulling off.
I had fallen out of touch with him in the past
several years. As several people have noted, it
is inspiring to see so many people who loved
him. I'm truly honored to call him my friend.
Kristi I'm so sorry.
I'll miss him
Tim
]]>
|
Sharon Cormany
corm0009@umn.edu
02/28/04@07:39
|
<![CDATA[I've known Patrick since way, way back--from the
Glen Ellyn Children's Chorus, of which he, his
sister, my sister and I were all members. I got
to know him better in high school, and eventually,
I talked hi into giving me guitar lessons. Now,
I've never had "regular" guitar lessons, but I
assume they start with scales and basic chords,
and then move on to songs like "Kumbaya" and
"Michael Row the Boat Ashore". The first song
Patrick taught me how to play was "Psychokiller"
by the Talking Heads. I never did quite get good
enough to make the chord changes smoothly, but
Patrick figured the whole point of learning how to
play guitar was to play songs you like, so why
even waste time with the usual campfire crap.
Patrick never did waste time with the usual crap.
That's what made him such an exceptional person. ]]>
|
J Clements
thefilmfarm@earthlink.net
03/01/04@12:18
|
<![CDATA[I will wirte more later, as it is just too difficult to
comprehend the loss of Patrick Wickham. It
has been very, very hard being so far away
from him and from my coleagues at ITVS.
Unreal, I guess. Am still stunned, I guess. I
did have a dream the night of the day of his
death and I would like to share it with you.
I dreamed that Patrick and about three other
people and I were going to have a party. (Yes,
it felt like oreination for the producers.) Patrick
was the person who knew where to go. We
walked along a city street to a restuarnt that
Patrick was sure that we would appreciate.
Once at the restaurant we see that we are on
another planet--and from space we can see
Earth. We are breathless by the earth's beauty
and by the incredicble detail we can see from
space. Then we see another planet, then
another; a parade of celestial bodies. I wake
up at a moment of peace and sensing
Patrick's own awe at the vastness and beauty
of the universe. He is is somwhere grand and
glorious I think. I hope though that when he is
ready he hurries back--we need him back on
Earth.
]]>
|
Jonathan Berman
jnb@fivepointsmedia.com
03/01/04@15:17
|
<![CDATA[I love/d Patrick! Who else would suggest, while I was shooting in
the Bay Area, to meet me at a dodgy downtown San Francisco
martini bar? Patrick arrived on his motorbike and we discussed
a small portion of all the neat geeky fun things he and I dug--
like Klaus Nomi, tiki culture, Kraftwerk, biking, geometric
patterns inducing altered states -- those kinds of things. I
guess what floats my boat about Patrick is that basic love of
ideas, art, and humanity. Patrick appears as a kindred spirit and
a fellow culture and subculture lover. His family, friends, and
colleagues have been blessed by his presence and so have I.
Jonathan Berman]]>
|
Nancy du Plessis
nancyduplessis@attglobal.net
03/02/04@06:16
|
<![CDATA[Most unfortunately, my only personal contact with
Patrick was during the January 2002 orientation
at itvs--but he was the life and soul of the
party (so to speak!): I deeply appreciated his
originality and wit, and feel bereaved for us
all, though at the same time I know that such a
brilliant personality lives on in those who knew
him.]]>
|
Caroline Libresco
caroline_libresco@sundance.org
03/03/04@19:14
|
<![CDATA[To Kristi and Patrick's loved ones--please accept
my deepest condolences. This is a terrible and
inexplicable loss. I'm filled with anguish. I had
the privelege of working with Patrick during my
time at ITVS and I must say his wit, humor and
brilliance were astounding to me. I quickly
became a die-hard Patrick-admirer, in awe of his
know-how and professionalism, but also his
singular style and self-possession. He was quite
simply the coolest guy around and the smartest
guy around. His passing reminds me to grab life
by the horns and feel the preciousness of this
moment. I will remember him vividly and with
great affection. I will especially remember
laughing with him about something silly or
ridiculous.
Caroline Libresco
]]>
|
Gail Dolgin
daughter_danang@igc.org
03/04/04@11:54
|
<![CDATA[Patrick was a hoot. An incredible intelligent
hoot of a human being. I first met him when
we were offered ITVS funding. At the time I
was going through chemo myself. I
remember sitting across from him at an
orientation dinner. The hat I was wearing kept
sliding down over my eyes, my bald head was
quite slippery. Who would have thought that
only three years later I would be with Patrick
as his life was slipping away. Holding his
hand days before he died, I felt the
weightlessness of his palm. I looked down
and saw his white skin against the sheet and
realized my hand was vibrating and glowing
red. Even in the end he was sharing himself
with me. I don’t think I absorbed his love of
sharks, leopards or bats, but I did take away a
bit of his spirit. Thank you Patrick.
Unfortunately I was continents away and
couldn’t be at the memorial, but I had my own
little visit with Patrick a few nights ago
watching the Academy Awards. Last year we
(Vicente Franco and I) invited Patrick to join us
at the Oscars. After all, it was Patrick who
walked us through the hallways and alleys of
ITVS, championing our interests, helping us
dodge deadlines, challenging and chastising
when necessary, and always ready to segue
from one line of thought to another without
skipping a beat. He was our man at ITVS and
we might never have gotten past our first
budget revision without him. Never one to
miss an opportunity for another bizarre
experience, his response to the Oscar invite
was true Patrick - all kid, thrilled and ready for
the fun…the only caveat was we weren’t
positive we’d have a ticket for him. No
problem, he assured us. He’d ride around all
night in the limo if we couldn’t get him in…or
sit in a Hollywood bar and watch it all on TV.
And he promised he’d keep his bat wings
hidden under his tux. That made it much
easier to get him past security.
Reading about Patrick from everyone who so
eloquently captured his spirit makes me mad,
sad and glad…mad that I didn’t get more time
with him, sad that his life was cut so short but
glad that he became and will remain a part of
my life.
]]>
|
John Podeszwa
bloppo@osb.att.ne.jp
03/05/04@16:32
|
<![CDATA[He once stole my underpants.]]>
|
Steve Friedman
s f r i e d m a n (at domain: PBS)(then: dot org)
03/09/04@20:36
|
<![CDATA[Saw the news in _Current_ just today; hadn't
spoken to Patrick since last July and didn't know
he'd been ill.
I'm a copyright guy. I try, usually in vain, to
explain the inexplicable arcana of music licencing
and public television to people who,
understandably, don't really want to know any more
than they have to, or even that. Pretty much
nobody ever gets it: not producers; not lawyers;
not music publishers; not the press. (Especially
not the press.)
Patrick got it. Patrick got everything. And that
is certainly a testament more to his patience,
intuition, and all-'round smarts than to my
efforts and my teaching skills.
We never met in person in the 12 or so years we
knew each other. But phone conversations with
Patrick were always a treat, even those ostensibly
about the compulsory licence and the seven-day
off-air school re-recording rights and the cable
copyright royalty claim-filing procedures;
ultimately they came to be about vastly more
interesting things. (We never did get to face off
and find out once and for all which of us was the
better Neil Young impersonator.)
This loss is one that really hurts.
]]>
|
Kristi Highum
kristihighum@yahoo.com
03/19/04@17:29
|
<![CDATA[Thank you ITVS for providing this opportunity to
share thoughts about Patrick. The last month
has been very difficult and it's always a
comfort to go back to these comments and
memories and stories and read how Patrick
has impressed himself upon so many others.
Among the many other projects we worked on
together Patrick and I had a website –
blankrebels.com. It's small, and often silly but
I think has that Patrick touch to it.
"Blank Rebels" was Patrick's idea (the
motorcycle/scooter club and the website) and
the Blank Rebels pages still showcase his
distinctive voice…for example, see links:
http://www.blankrebels.com/br_story.html
http://www.blankrebels.com/br_movies.html
My portion of the site was the "scrambler"
section; I've added a Memorial section for
Patrick – see link:
http://www.blankrebels.com/scrambler/index.h
tml
Content includes memorial service comments
from 2/21, photos of Patrick, and links to other
Patrick material I found online.
I've been overwhelmed with so much the last
few weeks, but am so humbled by the amount
of love and support coming my way and I just
wanted to say thank you to all of you out there.
It helps a bit, it does.
- Kristi
]]>
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Nina Mairs
ubernina@yahoo.com
04/01/04@17:05
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<![CDATA[I knew Patrick in college and after, in
Minneapolis. I saw him not nearly enough after
we both moved. As everyone has said before me,
he was a wonderful, witty, whimsical person who
has left a gigantic hole in the sky. I will never
look at leather, silver vinyl, or leapard print
the same way again. The superbowl will never
seem as fun. And no one will else will give me
insight on Elvis, the Mall of America, or Reagan
in the same way. He will be sorely, sorely
missed.]]>
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Lois Vossen
Lois_Vossen@itvs.org
04/19/04@17:31
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<![CDATA[I made these remarks at Patrick's funeral.
Sharing stories about what an extraordinary
man he was makes the loss slightly easier.
+++++
The third word that Patrick learned—after
“mommy” and “daddy—was “shit.” Soon he
went off to school. His teacher reported that
Patrick was very bright, an inquisitive child
who loved to learn. And he had great creativity.
She did have one concern: Patrick would only
color with the black crayon.
Last August, when Patrick was diagnosed
with cancer, the doctor’s basically had to build
him a new stomach because “stomach #1”
(as he liked to call it) wasn’t doing its job
anymore. The surgeons engineered “stomach
#2” to do the work. It was about 48 hours after
the surgery, and I was visiting Patrick in the
hospital. He started to talk about coming back
to work in a week or two. “Buddy, we’d love to
have you back in the office but you’ve got
some vacation days saved up. Are you sure
you don’t want to take a trip with Kristi, or just
stay home and read some books?” He shot
me that look, eyes gazing over the top rim of
his glasses, “what’s the matter Lo? You don’t
think I have the stomach for the job anymore?
Don’t think I have the guts to do what it takes?”
We meet people and if we’re lucky, over time
we discover how special they are. Not so with
Mr. Wickham. I always felt that a blind, deaf,
mute could spend five minutes with him and
would know he was utterly unique. Pretty
much everyone saw that. Dee Davis, president
of the ITVS board for many years said of
Patrick: “I was impressed to see the other
ITVS staff go to this junior member of the club
with most everything. He was quotable. He
had a caustic wit that separated pretense from
endeavor. And those that worked with him
trusted his radar. Patrick had little time for
phonies. What he did have was a sense of fair
play and an undisguisable Midwestern
earnestness. He believed in things:
friendship, art, fighting a good fight. He
showed up. He put in the effort. In an ethereal
enterprise he gave good weight. Each day he
strove to make the world mean something.”
It is safe to say that one of the major reasons
my time at ITVS has been so enjoyable, even
memorable, is because of Mr. Wickham. His
remarkable intelligence. His humor. His wit.
And best of all, his friendship. He had a heart
the size of a prize-winning sow. He was one of
a kind. You knew it the minute you met
him—even if he didn’t show you the
photograph of his and Kristi’s wedding in their
matching leopard print outfits. Kristi, he
showed that photograph to everyone. He was
so proud of it.
It was great that he found such a wonderful,
beautiful, fun, creative woman to share his life
with. We are all so pleased that you had each
other—before Patrick’s illness and during the
past six months when you were his rock. His
best friend. His Kristibelle. Sparkina. I can’t
imagine how difficult this journey would have
been for him without you by his side. Our
hearts and strength go out to you. Thank you
for bringing so much joy into Patrick’s life and
ours.
Patrick and I shared a kind of love-hate
relationship with San Francisco. Yes, it is
beautiful city but who can afford to live here? In
the months since his diagnosis, Patrick talked
about how pleased he was that he and Kristi
moved west and had this adventure. It is a
special city and we both acknowledged that.
But I knew the secret. The best way to discover
this city was from the back of Patrick’s
motorcycle. Whether we were heading down
Hwy. 1, or he was dropping me off at the bus
depot on the way home from C Bobby’s Owl
Tree or a late night at the office. Or just tooling
around the city, with Kristi next to him on her
scooter. This city had a special charm from
the back of Patrick’s Yamaha VStar.
One December, Patrick decided to give Kristi a
Theramin for Christmas. We both tended to
get to the office early. He arrived extra early
that month and built the Theramin. When it
was done, he began practicing songs. This
was in our old, tiny office at 51 Federal Street
which was the size of a glove compartment,
so the Theramin was literally next to my
cubicle. Imagine beginning your work day with
a Theramin serenade of “Silent Night.” That’s
what it was like to work every day with Patrick.
When the news went out that Patrick had
cancer, many producers wrote with wonderful
stories about him. This note from producer
Heather Lyons stuck with me: “Patrick walked
me through one of the scariest times in my life
when a production company erased six of my
master tapes when I was about 80%
completed with editing my ITVS project. Maybe
that’s why Halloween is his favorite holiday.
He makes the really scary not scary at all!”
No situation was beyond his wonderful black
humor, a humor that defined his contagious
view of the world. So I want to thank his mom
Virginia for bringing him into the world. And
thank you Patrick for the motorcycle rides. The
pop tarts for lunch. The Theramin concerts.
Your ability to quote episodes of Dr. Katz. For
keeping me company at ITVS board meetings.
For being the best person I ever knew at
keeping a secret.
When Kristi would go out of town without
Patrick he couldn’t wait for his girl to get back.
“That Kristi,” he’d say, “I miss her.”
Patrick, we miss you already. But I know that
you’re still with us, helping us through the
really scary things.
]]>
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Pete Beuscher
beuscher@megsinet.net
05/21/04@07:40
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<![CDATA[Kristi, Mrs. Wickham and friends, I wanted to
share with you some of the memories I had of Pat.
Pat and I met in the fourth grade at St.
Petronille School in Glen Ellyn. We had both
transferred in from public schools. I sat next
to Pat, and I remember in class that Pat would
keep all of these little rubber toy animals in
his desk; his favorite was a horned toad
named, “Horny.” Pat was always one of the
brightest students. In fifth grade he was the
only one who knew what DNA stood for. We built
model rockets, traded football cards at lunch and
made some Super 8 movies. He loved the work of
Ray Harryhausen, and we would take his Playmobil
figures and make them move on film. We also
liked to ride BMX bikes and go to “Baja Hills” on
the Prairie Path to watch the cool kids do “table
tops.” For my 12th birthday, Pat and I went to
Great America. Pat was also into Dungeons and
Dragons, being the first, only and best dungeon
master that I knew. He started playing guitar,
and his first band was the “Popwick Transfusion.”
Pat transferred to another school for 7th and 8th
grade, but we remained friends.
At Glenbard West, we had our own radio show on
WGHS. It broadcasted at 88.5 FM and could be
heard throughout (most of) Glen Ellyn. Freshman
year our show, was named “The Cheap Sunglasses”
show, in honor of the ZZ-top song and the fact
that we couldn’t afford “shades.” The music we
played was mainly 60s rock, The Stones, The Who,
and of course, Pat’s idol at the time, Jimi
Hendrix. The next year was a watershed year when
Pat caught the New Wave bug. Our sophomore year
our show was renamed the “Pat and Pete” show. In
the fall of 1983, I remember Pat bringing in a
12” of “Blue Monday” by New Order and one
of “The Walk” by the Cure. He liked “Men
Without Hats” and liked to do the “Safety
Dance.” He had a band called “Eyes on Troy”
which featured the hits “In the Shadows” and “If
I Had a Car.” He introduced me to ska, reggae
and so many cool bands that I don’t know where to
start. When I took guitar lessons from Pat the
songs he taught me were “One Thing Leads to
Another” by the Fixx and “Bad Moon Rising” by
Creedence.
We took German class together in high school, and
we became fans of “Guten Tag” which were bizarre
language films. I recently acquired a nearly
complete set of “Guten Tags” on 16mm and thought
Pat would think it would be cool. If he had
visited, we would have had a “Guten Tag” film
festival similar to the one we had in high
school. Pat also turned me on to “This is Spinal
Tap” and “The Rocky Horror Picture Show”, which
he knew all the lines by the second time he went.
I saw Pat over the summers during college. I
knew he was really getting into film, and he
couldn’t stop talking about “Fellini Satyricon,”
a movie I had seen but didn’t get until Pat
recited the cool parts. I think we went to Great
America again around this time and the question
of the day was “Do you live in Gurnee?” which we
asked almost every employee that day.
Unfortunately, Pat and I lost touch as we moved
to different cities. When I look back on my
formative years, Pat was perhaps one of the
biggest influences.
I grabbed a couple of CDs for the ride to work
this morning, including “New Order – Substance.”
I chose it because I wanted to listen to “Blue
Monday” and remember the good times with Pat.
However, as the first track on the CD played, a
flood of memories came back. The song
was “Ceremony,” and it occurred to me that at the
end of our sophomore year (1984) Pat had compiled
a list of his top 10 favorite songs of all time.
I am positive that was his number one song from
that list. The words from a song that moved Pat
way back then seem relevant now:
“Picture me and then you start watching
Watching forever - watching forever “
]]>
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ggg
ggg
06/25/04@06:02
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<![CDATA[ggg]]>
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amy carlson
acthistle@aol.com
07/12/04@17:38
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<![CDATA[I haven't seen Pat since High School but I am
profoundly saddened by the news of his passing.
Pat and I were in many 'nerd'/honor classes
together and he was one of the smartest people I
ever met, still is. I was always just trying to
keep up with him, Jordan, Lyle, Doug and
others... I remember when the Jr. High Boys
played D and D in a tent in my backyard. That
made me cool by default, and so did listening to
their radio shows in H.S. My thoughts and
prayers to his family and wife. ]]>
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Kimberly Schlichting
kschlichjfk@hotmail.com
07/21/04@13:04
|
<![CDATA[Wow. It's been a long time since I've seen Pat,
probably 8-9 years. I had no idea what happened
and was just last week reminiscing about him and
our other HS friends. Even now that I
accidently reached this site, it's like he's
still alive for me. I will remember Pat and
thank him for being the one person that I could
always count on for understanding me and being
an ear and a friend in my many moments of
adolescent angst. I always knew he was
viciously intelligent, but when I look back on
him now with his sense of humor, caring, and
interest in so many cultural products, I realize
he was also wise and just plain humane.
My thoughts and best wishes go to Kristi and his
family. Thank you ITVS for this site.]]>
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Phil Anderson
pmkanders@mac.com
09/16/04@16:09
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<![CDATA[It has been many years since I've seen Pat, but
I had the great pleasure of knowing him both at
Glenbard West and Carleton. Although we did not
hang out much together, our respective circle of
friends often intersected at each place.
A few random memories -
During the German Club field trip to the Von
Steuben Day Parade/Oktoberfest in Chicago(I
think in 1985), we watched the parade scene
of "Ferris Bueler's Day Off" being filmed - with
everone doing the "twist & shout" to the Beatles
being played over the loudspeakers. On the bus
ride home, I remember having a long conversation
with Pat on Morrisey of the Smiths. I also saw
him perform with "Eyes on Troy" numerous times
as many of my friends were in another high
school band, "Rational Actors."
At Carleton, I remember going to see him in his
band "Guns & Butter" play at the Cave. They did
a fantastic cover of Joy Divison's "New Dawn
Fades"
It sounds like his lively personality and
creative spirit flourished after graduating
Carleton. I was saddened to hear his life was
cut too short. My thoughts go out to his wife &
family.]]>
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ken sumka
kensumka@yahoo.com
06/14/06@01:37
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<![CDATA[A little late getting here but I wanted to share
my Pat stories.
I'm not sure how I was introduced to Pat but we
ended up playing in two bands together. First was
Eyes on Troy who over the years since has
achieved a legendary status among GWHS Alums. I
was their first 'live' drummer. (Anyone have a
playable copy of their cassette? Contact me)
While we had a lot more originals than most high
school bands of the era, the covers we did are
forever linked to my memories of Pat. Songs
like "Moral Kiosk", "Shadowplay", "Dear Prudence"
and "Dreams Never End" and "Gut Feeling". I'm
convinced if "In The Shadows" came out today, it
would be a hit. I am still deeply indebted to Pat
for introducing me to: Joy Division/New Order &
The Cure.
Pat worked at Marshall Field's for awhile and got
a hold of a bunch of these stickers that
said "Warehouse Sale", so for a one-off
performance at a Kool Aid (these were 'charity'
concerts held at 1st Presbytarian Church basement
in G.E.) we became the band Warehouse Sale. We
already had the stickers, so we already had
our 'merch' to give out. We worked up about a
dozen or so new wave-era covers (Cure, New Order,
Devo etc) and played right before an Eyes on
Troy 'reunion'. That night I played in two bands
with Pat and also in my own band Rational Actors
and still remember what a blast it was.
It a testment to Pat's talent, wit and amazing
musical taste that I can't go a week without
hearing a song that in some way reminds me of him.
My regards to Pat's family, he is sorely missed.]]>
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Emily
emily.stevens@comcast.net
07/30/06@22:21
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<![CDATA[I hope this site remains active. I like to visit memories of PW.
Never too late to add more.
Patrick & Kristi came down to LA in Oct '03 for a variety of
events. One was to go to Disneyland because it was Nightmare
Before Christmas at the Haunted Mansion, and Pat was a huge
fan of both Tim Burton and Halloween. We insisted Patrick
accept the rental scooter because DL can be exhasting at full
strength, and Pat was, if memory serves, carrying the chemo
shoulder bag. And it was a hot day. He zoomed around on the
scooter in his flame shirt, he gave the scooter a funny name I
wish I could remember, oh well, Kristi probably does. It was a
really fun day. The Haunted Mansion didn't disappoint.
We sat by the pool that weekend and Patrick talked about how
he longed to vote in the Nov 04 presidential election. He was
impassioned, angry, and, as always, bitingly articulate on the
subject. And he was right.
Miss him.]]>
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Melissa Koop
melissa.koop@telefonica.net
09/10/06@06:29
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<![CDATA[I'm so glad this site is still going strong. I
re-read the messages every few months.
I live in Spain and have been here for nearly 15
years and yet there are so many things I come
across, even over here, that don't let me forget
him: songs (of course), films (obviously), and
the bat on the Valencia football team's coat of
arms. I remember looking all over Madrid to find
him that t-shirt and I was so happy to send it
to him and find him wearing it when I visited
him in Mpls.
I was fortunate to have Patrick visit me in
Spain. He came with Jordan and we all travelled
down to Valencia together to Las Fallas. It was
the perfect celebration for him. Each
neighborhood spends the whole year making an
enormous paper maché and wood sculpture that
makes some sort of politcal statement. On the
last night, all the statues are set on fire and
the city burns on every corner. All the while
people, even small children, set off
firecrackers until dawn and there is the most
spectacular firworks show at midnight. We were
staying in a beach town called Cullera a train
ride away and made it back to our rented flat
around 7am the next morning.
My kids really love to dig through my photo
albums and just the other day were looking
through my Valencia photos. There is one where
Patrick and I are standing on top of two big
rocks on the beach throwing our hands to the
sky. We were pretending to shoot an album cover.
My boys and I looked through the pictures
together and I told them all about Patrick.]]>
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